Renegade (Devil’s Boneyard MC 6) Page 5

  Fawn skipped into the room, the doll clutched in her arms, and she clambered onto a seat at the kitchen table. Nik came in right after her, setting the bowl of soup down. I glanced down the hall and saw that Darby’s door was still closed.

  “Darby not awake yet?” I asked. “I wasn’t sure how long she’d been sleeping.”

  Nikki chewed her lip and glanced down the hall, then back at me. She did it twice more and I got the hint, forcing my feet to move toward Darby’s room, the one place I knew I needed to avoid. The woman tugged on my heart and I didn’t have time for that shit. I needed to deal with her issue and get her the hell out of my house.

  Pushing her door open, I’d taken all of three steps before I froze in shock, then called myself an asshole when my dick got hard looking at Darby’s naked body. She might be bruised and battered, maybe even a bit too skinny, but the woman had the perkiest breasts I’d ever seen. Her nipples tightened under my perusal and I knew I was going to fucking hell. If I’d ever had a doubt before, I didn’t now.

  “Shit,” I muttered and took a step back, bumping into the door making it shut behind me. My gaze shot up to her face, and what I saw had me moving forward again, and not stopping until I had her in my arms.

  Chapter Four

  Darby

  It hadn’t occurred to me that I should lock the door before I got out of bed and removed the shirt I’d been wearing. Or maybe it was more accurate that I’d still been groggy and not thinking clearly. I’d woken and noticed the clothes on the dresser. Curious, I’d stood up to see what the biker had bought, and had just removed the shirt so I could put something on when he’d entered the room. It felt like the air was sucked out of the space. At first, my body had locked tight, my heart pounding. I’d felt like a rabbit the second it sees a coyote. Boomer had enjoyed catching me by surprise, and would do anything he could to humiliate me.

  The moment Renegade froze, I realized he hadn’t intended to catch me naked. Slowly, I relaxed. Enough men had seen me naked that I wasn’t overly shy about my body anymore. Not usually. I’d been desensitized the hard way. Boomer delighted in ripping my clothes off in the midst of a gathering and letting his friends look and touch all they wanted. It took a moment for me to remember that this man wasn’t Boomer. He hadn’t hurt me, hadn’t done anything inappropriate in the short time I’d known him. It didn’t mean he couldn’t or wouldn’t, but so far, he’d proven trustworthy. If Fawn believed he was safe, then he probably was. She’d developed excellent skills at reading men, which made me feel like the worst mother ever.

  As Renegade perused my body, it was the look in his eyes as he’d scanned me from head to… well, breast since he seemed to focus there, that got a reaction from me. I’d seen lust in men’s eyes before, but Renegade looked at me with reverence, as if I were a flesh and blood goddess who had entered his home. No one had ever looked at me like that before. He wasn’t reaching for me, wasn’t leering or telling me to drop to my knees, or to spread my legs. He looked, yes, but I knew the moment he felt bad about it. He took a step back toward the door, reaching blindly for it but ended up bumping it shut instead.

  My traitorous body reacted to him. I’d never been turned on, not the way a woman is for a man. There had been some crushes after I’d turned twelve, including the insane stalkerish one I’d had for the man standing in front of me, but nothing like this. I was aware of Renegade. Not as his prey, but as a woman who had never known the gentle touch of a man. I’d been used like an object with no feelings, just a hole for men to stick their dicks into. The way he watched me, it made me think that things might be different with him. I didn’t delude myself into thinking he was a saint, he’d even claimed he wasn’t one, but there was a kindness in his eyes that I hadn’t witnessed in a long time. Not directed at me anyway. The fact I remembered the gentleness he’d shown his sister all those years ago, and the way he’d been with Fawn, made me want some of that kindness for myself.

  I don’t know if I made a noise or shifted, but he seemed locked in place and his gaze lifted to meet mine. My body warmed, and even though my mind was screaming that he was a man and men only ever hurt me, I felt myself grow slick between my legs. The hunger in his gaze, the uncertainty in them, as if he wanted me but felt like he shouldn’t, made my skin warm. For the first time in my life, I wanted to know what it would feel like to be touched the way lovers touched in the movies. The next thing I knew, I was in his arms. With anyone else, I’d have felt fear. Renegade was a stranger for the most part, a biker at that. I should be terrified given my experience with men like him, or even men in general, but for whatever reason, the moment those arms closed around me, I felt… safe. Protected. And I couldn’t help but melt against him, clutch at his cut, and wish that he wouldn’t let go. His scent filled my nose -- spice and a bit of tang. It was the best thing I’d ever smelled.

  All those old feelings welled up inside of me. The need to know what it would be like to kiss him, to be held like this by him, to just be his. It was what I’d wanted when I was too young to really understand. Being this close to him made me want him with the same feverish need I’d had five years ago, when I should have been giggling over high school boys and not crushing on a grown man with a beard and a motorcycle.

  “Darby.” My name was a soft caress with his deep voice. A shiver raked my spine and my nipples hardened even more. I’d never felt desire before, not this level of it. I’d thought boys were cute, had wanted Renegade even though I’d never met him, but being abducted by Boomer had cured me of ever wanting a man to touch me.

  Until now. Until the man I’d once yearned for held me in his arms.

  What the hell is wrong with you? He’s a biker! A man!

  Didn’t matter what I told myself. His touch felt right. If he’d been holding me too tight, or rubbed himself against me, then maybe I’d have panicked. All Renegade did was clasp me to his body. I could feel the hard length of his cock where it pressed against me, but it seemed involuntary and not intentional. He rubbed his chin against my cheek, then trailed his nose along the column of my neck.

  I gasped and felt my knees go a little weak.

  “Tell me to leave,” he said. “I shouldn’t be here, shouldn’t want you. Send me away, Darby. If you say the words, I’ll go.”

  I licked my lips. “And if I don’t?”

  He groaned. “Darby, please. You can’t want this. Not after all you’ve been through. I won’t use you like they did. Tell me to go.”

  I opened my mouth, but the words that spilled out weren’t what he’d demanded, nor were they what I’d intended to say. No, instead, my traitorous lips formed the words I’d wanted to tell him when I was just a kid with raging hormones.

  “Kiss me.” He sucked in a breath and pulled back so I could see his face. “Please, Renegade. Just a kiss. Nothing more.”

  He studied me a moment, as if trying to judge my sincerity. As his head lowered, it felt like my heart was taking off at a gallop. The moment his lips touched mine, it felt like fire flowed through my veins, my body awakening for the first time. His tongue flicked against my lower lip and I opened, letting him in. The taste of him made me press closer, needing more. His mouth devoured mine, left me hungering for more, craving his touch as much as I needed my next breath. The emotions swirling through me both scared and fascinated me. I wanted to run away and hold on all at the same time. His hand slid down my back and around my waist, his arm binding me to him. When he pushed against a bruise, I whimpered, making him stop and take a step back.

  “Christ. I’m sorry, Darby. I never should have done that.”

  “I asked you to,” I reminded him. “And… I’m not sorry.”

  He watched me, and I refused to look away. I wanted him to see that he’d affected me, and that while part of me was scared, I also wanted more. Regret what we’d just done? Not even a little. Want him to keep going? Maybe. I definitely wanted more of his kisses, even though I shouldn’t. The smart thing would be to grab Fawn an
d run as far and fast as I could. There was a chance I would elude Boomer, but I couldn’t risk my daughter. No matter how scary it was to feel something for the man in front of me, I needed to stay as long as he’d let me.

  “No one’s ever kissed me like that,” I admitted. “You’re the first man I’ve ever asked to touch me, and the first to make me want more. It’s not what happens between a man and a woman that’s scaring me right now. It’s how you make me feel. I’ve never wanted anyone before, not with this intensity. Before, I just had teen crushes. This is different.”

  I didn’t know why the words were spilling out of my mouth. I needed to shut up. Just get dressed and walk out of the room, but my feet led me to him and not the dresser. I placed my hand on his chest, feeling his heart thump against my fingers. He didn’t look like the type of man to back down. He’d always been the bad boy. Sexy. Forbidden. Right now, I just wanted him to be mine for at least a few minutes. I wanted all those teen fantasies to come to life, to have some good memories to last me a lifetime.

  “You pressed on my bruise. It wasn’t distress over what we were doing that made me make that noise.”

  His gaze scanned my body and he grimaced. “I shouldn’t have touched you if for no other reason than you have a lot of healing to do. Even if you did ask for the kiss, I didn’t have to agree to it.”

  I cocked my head. “Why did you?”

  It wasn’t like a man who looked like him would be lacking for female attention. While he wasn’t model-type gorgeous, there was a rugged, dangerous air about him that I had no doubt would draw the opposite sex to him, and possibly even the same sex. He had that type of sex appeal I’d seen on TV but had never truly witnessed in person, not as a grown woman at any rate. The man had been mouthwatering when I was a teenager, but raging hormones then compared to how I felt now? No comparison. And his voice? Dear God. When the man spoke, I wanted to ask him to never stop. He could probably sell ice to Eskimos. If he whispered dirty things in my ear, it might be enough to make me come.

  I didn’t think he would answer. Renegade looked away, staring at the wall. The silence dragged on and I was about to tell him to just forget it when he finally spoke.

  “I haven’t been interested in women the last few months. The women at the clubhouse have tried and failed to get into my pants. You’re the last woman I should want, and yet I get hard just thinking about you, and I know that’s all kinds of fucked up. You’re too young. Been abused and sexually assaulted. You need help and a place to heal, not me sticking my dick in you.”

  “But you haven’t demanded that I spread my legs for you. You haven’t asked anything of me,” I reminded him.

  When he focused on me, the heat nearly seared me. “Maybe not, but I want to. Do you want to know what I want?”

  I stared, unable to say yes or no, unable to look away.

  “I want to grab a handful of your hair and tell you to get on your knees and open your mouth. I want to feed my cock to you, make you take all of me until you gag -- and you will because I’m not small -- then I want to fuck you until I come. Except with you, I don’t think that would be enough. I’d still be hard.” He growled and advanced a step. “Then I’d spread you out on the bed, put those shapely legs of yours over my shoulders and take you hard and deep, fuck you so good you’d not be able to walk. I want to see your tits bounce as I drive my dick into your wet pussy, make you beg me for more. You’d come so hard that you’d soak the bed, and I’d demand even more from you.”

  I knew my eyes had to be wide. My chest was heaving with my labored breaths, but it wasn’t from fear. It should be, by all means, but it wasn’t. No, his words were turning me on, or rather the images they evoked were making me hot and wet. I could see it just as he’d described. Rubbing my thighs together didn’t ease the ache. Renegade closed the distance between us, one hand going to my hair and the other between my legs. I cried out as his fingers slid along the lips of my pussy, and found myself opening up wide for him.

  The first swipe of his finger against my clit had me seeing stars. I panted and bit my lip to keep from making a fool of myself with words I shouldn’t utter. He shifted, rubbing the hard bud with his thumb as he plunged two fingers inside me. It only took three strokes before I was coming, my body shuddering with the force of my release. I’d never had an orgasm, unless it was self-induced, even though I’d seen the faked ones on the porn Boomer watched. My fingers couldn’t compare to what Renegade was doing to me.

  “That’s it, angel. Come for me.”

  As if his words alone were powerful enough, I felt another climax building and soon I was coming again. I ached from head to toe, had been through hell before he’d found me, but despite it all, I felt the most intense pleasure ever at his hands. I reached for his belt, unfastening it and unzipping his pants. Reaching inside the band of his underwear, I gripped his cock and gave it a little squeeze. Renegade hissed in a breath. I’d never voluntarily touched a man before, not like this, but I wanted to give him the same release he’d given me. His fingers still drove into my pussy and worked my clit. I was too selfish to kneel and take him into my mouth because I wanted him to keep touching me, wanted to come again and again. I needed that euphoria, but only if it was Renegade touching me.

  “Darby.” His voice was nearly all growl.

  “I didn’t want them, never asked them to do those things to me.” I stroked his cock. “I don’t know why, but I’m not afraid of you. I want you. So much.”

  He added a third finger and my eyes crossed. Sweet Jesus! He hit just the right spot and I came so hard it felt like I blacked out for a moment. When everything came into focus again, I was draped over the side of the bed, my breasts rubbing against the soft comforter as he nudged my feet apart.

  I looked over my shoulder and saw the need etched on his features. He shoved his jeans and boxer briefs down his thighs, his cock long, hard, and thick. The head looked angry as he gave it a few strokes, then he was pressing against me.

  “If you don’t want this, tell me now,” he said.

  I didn’t say a word and he thrust into me, not stopping until I’d taken every inch of him.

  “Fuck!” He slammed into me again. “So fucking good. Never felt anything as amazing as your pussy.”

  I opened my mouth to warn him he hadn’t put on a condom, but he stole the breath from my lungs with his frenzied thrusts.

  Soon he was driving into me, and as I felt his cock swell, another orgasm hit me. I screamed out his name as he fucked me, taking what he wanted, what he needed. He roared out his release and I felt the hot splash of his cum inside of me. My breath froze. No. God, no. If I was carrying anything and gave it to him…

  “Renegade.”

  He ground his hips against me, his cock as deep as it would go.

  “Renegade, you didn’t use a condom.”

  My words seemed to douse him in an icy dose of reality. He cursed and jerked free of my body. I felt his cum slide out of me and stood, turning to face him. He stared at the mess now trickling down the insides of my thighs with horror. My heart shattered in that moment. He’d been the only one to ever give me such a beautiful moment, but now it was ruined.

  “We need to both get tested.” I swallowed hard. “I don’t know if I’m carrying anything from…”

  He growled and jerked up his pants, storming out of my room and slamming the door shut behind him. I snatched a few pieces of clothing off the dresser and dashed across the hall to the bathroom. Someone had laid out plastic wrap on the counter. I used it to cover my stitches before starting the water. Showering off the evidence of what we’d done, I cried and called myself ten times a fool. Being with him had been wonderful, until I’d reminded him I was no better than a whore. I’d been used often, and not just by Boomer. He’d give me to anyone if the price was right. And I’d reminded Renegade of how dirty I was, how unworthy of him. I was such an idiot. I needed to figure out where I’d take Fawn. After this, there was no way he’d let me sta
y here. When I’d let him take me, I’d never considered he wouldn’t use a condom. Even though Boomer and his friends hadn’t, Renegade had seemed like the cautious type. Until the moment I asked him to kiss me.

  I got out of the shower and quickly dried off, removed the plastic wrap, then dressed. My stitches held up and hadn’t gotten wet. As I stepped into the hallway, a wave of dizziness hit me, making me stumble. I reached for the wall to support myself, but it wasn’t enough and I sank to my knees. Even though I’d eaten earlier, it had been too long since I’d had regular meals. Maybe I could at least get a few slices of bread before I had to leave, anything to hold me over. The thought of taking Fawn from this house nearly made me throw up. A gasp drew my attention and I looked up to see Nikki staring at me in horror.

  “Renegade!” she screamed, then rushed toward me.

  I heard a door farther down the hall slam open and heavy steps come toward me. Closing my eyes, I wished the ground would just open up and swallow me. The last thing I wanted was for him to see me like this. Not after what we’d shared and the way he’d bolted.

  “What happened?” he asked, keeping a good foot of space between us.

  “I found her like this,” Nikki said. “I thought I heard something and came to check on her.”

  “I’m fine,” I managed, but even to my ears my words sounded slurred.

  Shit. It wasn’t hunger. I knew what was about to happen and I couldn’t stop it. Within seconds, my body tilted until I fell to the floor. When I came to again, I knew I’d only been out of it for a few seconds. The episodes never lasted more than a minute. When they’d first started, I’d had no warning and hadn’t even realized what was happening until someone pointed out I was spacing out a lot. Turns out, I wasn’t doing that at all. I was having a type of seizure. As I’d gotten older, they’d changed a bit. Now I’d get dizzy within seconds of having one. Then again, I got dizzy when I didn’t eat as well, so sometimes it was hard to tell if I was about to black out or not. The slurred speech right before it happened was new, though. I’d only had that happen twice now.